10/30/2023

Cohen questions in her illuminating debut the notion “that a long-term monogamous romantic relationship is necessary for a normal, successful adulthood” and considers what a life that prioritizes “devoted” friendships might look like instead. Among others for whom friendship is “life’s centerpiece,” Cohen interviews Christian youth pastors Art and Nick, who weathered backlash from fellow church members who believed the two men were dating, and retirees Barb and Inez, who “found a mirror” in each other and serve as one another’s de facto caretakers. According to Cohen, society is hard-pressed to understand friendships that in some ways supersede romantic relationships because they’re a “provocation—unsettling the set of social tenets that circumscribe our intimate lives.” It’s partly this “unclassifiable” quality that lends friendship its unique power, however; without “a prewritten script to follow,” people can construct their own friendship narratives, Cohen contends. Personal details from the author’s own friendships enrich the work, and thoughtful analyses of the historical expectations of marriage and friendship underscore the subject’s complexity. It’s a smart and heartfelt testament to the power of social bonds outside “compulsory couplehood.” (Feb.)

"I loved and recommend [The Other Significant Others] to everybody." —Ezra Klein

"Rhaina Cohen’s moving, intimate portraits of people in unusually devoted friendships upend our cultural narratives about which relationships matter. A perceptive and vivid reporter, she reveals that there are far more pathways to deep connection and fulfillment than we’ve been made to believe. The Other Significant Others is an arresting work of compassion and insight." —Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone and co-host of Dear Therapists podcast

"In her lovingly written The Other Significant Others, Rhaina Cohen does crucial work by questioning easy social categorization and the hierarchies of recognition and privilege that too often put romantically coupled pairs at the top. The Other Significant Others is energetic, open, considered, and beautifully reported. It thrums with a passion for the subject, and is powered by a historically rich, intellectually serious curiosity about the relationships that provide backbone and ballast to so many of our lives, but which have only recently begun to receive the consideration they are due." —Rebecca Traister, New York Times bestselling author of All the Single Ladies and Good and Mad

"An absorbing overhaul of everything you thought you knew about friendship. The Other Significant Others is a platonic revelation and a revolution." —Marisa Franco, New York Times bestselling author of Platonic

"I feel like I've been waiting for this book for my entire adult life. The Other Significant Others is a radical and deeply persuasive argument for prioritizing the best friendships that ground us, that complete us, that make us feel loved and allow us to love others so deeply in return." —Anne Helen Petersen, author of Can't Even and co-author of Out of Office

"Terrific and important." —Dan Savage

"We have seen society can broaden its definition of love, and The Other Significant Others shows we can go further still. Through unforgettable stories, Rhaina Cohen makes a crucial case for expanding the range of committed relationships we recognize. A captivating call to embrace love in all its profound forms." —Jim Obergefell, lead plaintiff in Obergefell v. Hodges and co-author of Love Wins

"[T]his is not some saccharine ode to BFF-dom. Cohen reports on several real-life examples that defy convention, each carving out a unique path that reveals radical approaches to how we show up for one another." —Mother Jones

"[An] illuminating debut . . . a smart and heartfelt testament to the power of social bonds outside 'compulsory coupledom.'" —Publishers Weekly

"Thought-provoking . . . engaging . . . an enlightening read. This book serves as a powerful catalyst for readers to question societal norms and broaden their understanding of meaningful connections. Inspiring." —Booklist

"Written with empathy, curiosity and a clear knack for storytelling . . . The Other Significant Others offers readers an insightful and intimate look at what life could be like if we broaden our horizons beyond ‘compulsory coupledom’ and welcome the idea that ‘romantic relationships’ are not the only unions that can shape our lives.” —Bookpage (starred review)

"Cohen presents an eye-opening exploration of the many ways friendship, in various forms, can enrich and empower lives for the better." —Shelf Awareness

"An eloquent collection of stories from different pairs of friends, spanning the gamut of age, sexual orientation and social class . . . poignant." —The Guardian

This illuminating audiobook provides clarity and a degree of legitimacy to friendships that are central to a person's life but not romantic or sexual. These relationships can take many forms--from friendships that are unusually close and time consuming to committed relationships that involve cohabiting or even raising children. When people in these close relationships are married to others, their connections can be threatening to spouses, but the author argues that such friendships can reduce what is expected in a traditional romantic marriage. Author Rhaina Cohen's vocal warmth and commitment to her ideas make this a touching audiobook. Her thinking and humanitarian spirit are well served by a performance that resonates with her broad sociological perspectives, as well as her desire to connect with listeners. T.W. © AudioFile 2024, Portland, Maine